The last few weeks have been full of mixed emotions, and some sleepless nights for me. I had been feeling stretched, trying to figure out when I could visit both my grandfather in his rehab facility, and when I could go visit his sister, Aunt Sister, in her nursing home across town. My sweet, outgoing Aunt Sister had been on my mind so much over the last few weeks, but my time had gone completely into seeing my grandfather, trying to give him motivation to complete his physical therapy so that he could come home. I feared for my grandmother, driving every day into downtown Fort Worth by herself to be with grandaddy. I worried about her, and still do, that she would still take care of herself while caring for him-as only she can. My grandmother is a strong, and loving person, one that I aspire to be; but still, I worried that her own health was not on her mind-how could it be!!!
On Friday, Aunt Sister went home to be with Jesus, and I know she is singing hymns with the angels at this very moment(and probably playing piano too)! She was 96, and had lived a long and amazing life. She had Alzheimers, and my grandfather was diagnosed with dementia not too long ago....so you can imagine my heart dropping, knowing that my grandmother would have to tell her husband (with dementia) that his older sister had passed...and I wonder how many times she will have to remind him of this in the future. This is the true meaning of wedding vows-in good times and bad, in sickness and in health. My heart is torn, because I know without a doubt that God has his arms wrapped so tightly around my grandparents during this time, and that they have no doubt that God's will has been served in Aunt Sister's life too; but I am still sad and worried.......for my grandfather and grandmother, for my family that is full of "the older crowd", and knowing that I am entering a season of loss in my life (though I am hopeful that it isn't all at once~!)----and I want to deal gracefully. I pray that these times are filled with precious memories of the time I get to ENJOY with my family.
Speaking of enjoying-On Saturday, we celebrated the joy of having my grandfather with us for 89years-what a gift!! Here's a pic--Chase sang Happy Birthday so loud to him!
A few weeks ago, Grandaddy got to meet his newest great grandson-Evan...another memory I will cherish!
Aunt Sister, I remember:
- Singing hymns while she played the piano effortlessly, and to perfection-her voice ringing higher than the keys.
- Knowing that, while I may be short, she would be there to hug my waist, and I could look her in the eye-heehee.
- Visiting her the last few times, and watching her face light up when she saw Chase--and him giving her precious kisses and hugs.
Precious Lord,
I know that You are in control, You are the ultimate planner, I could never design my life in Your perfect way--I pray that You continue to cradle my heart, and the hearts of my family, and that You continue to protect the lives of those that care so deeply for others. Give me grace and peace in your Will.
